Chota Santa stopped by the corner grocery store and read the following list to the Sabji wala:
10 kilo sugar at Rs 1.25 a kilo
4 kilo coffee at Rs1.50 a kilo
2 kilo butter at Rs1.10 a kilo
2 bars soap at Rs0.83 each
4 kilo coffee at Rs1.50 a kilo
2 kilo butter at Rs1.10 a kilo
2 bars soap at Rs0.83 each
“How much does that come to?” asked Larry.
“Twenty-two rupees and thirty-six
paisa.”
“If I gave you three ten rupee
bills, how much change would I get?” said Chota Santa.
“Seven rupees and sixty-four paisa,” stated the Sabji wala who appeared to be irritated by all the questions.
Chota
Santa said, as he disappeared through the door, “Mujhe ye sab nahi kharid ne ka he..
mujhe to bas apne kal ke math homework ka an“
·
Even though he could not tell time, my three-year-old grandson was playing with a wall clock when I visited.
Later, when I was putting on my coat to
leave, I asked him what time it was. He looked at the clock blankly, then
brightened.
“It’s
time for you to go,” he answered triumphantly.
·
Beta papa se: Papa main itna bada kab ho jaunga ki mummy se bina poochey ghar se bahar ja sakoo.
Papa
thandi saans lete hue: Beta, itna bada toh abhi main bhi nahi hua hoon.
Submitted by: arvin
·
A teacher once asks all students to write an essay on the topic “A Poor Family”. One student gets the lowest marks for writing that essay . The student happens to be the richest girl in the entire class and her essay goes on as…
·
Two babies were sitting in their cribs, when one baby shouted to the other,
“Are you a little girl or a little boy?”
“I don’t know,” replied the other baby
giggling.”What do you mean, you don’t know?” said the first baby.
“I mean I don’t know how to tell the difference,” was the reply.
Well, I do,” said the first baby
chuckling. “I’ll climb into your crib and find out.”
He
carefully climbed himself into the other baby’s crib, then
quickly disappeared beneath the blankets. After a couple of minutes, he resurfaced with a big grin on his face.
“You’re a little girl, and I’m a little boy,” he said proudly.
“You’re ever so clever,” cooed the baby girl, “but how can you tell?”
quickly disappeared beneath the blankets. After a couple of minutes, he resurfaced with a big grin on his face.
“You’re a little girl, and I’m a little boy,” he said proudly.
“You’re ever so clever,” cooed the baby girl, “but how can you tell?”
“It’s quite easy really,” replied the baby boy,
“You’ve got pink socks and I’ve got blue ones.”
TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water?
PAPPU : “HIJKLMNO” !!
PAPPU : “HIJKLMNO” !!
TEACHER
: What are you
talking about?
PAPPU : Yesterday you said it’s H to O !
PAPPU : Yesterday you said it’s H to O !
·
A man walks into a store to buy a Barbie doll for his daughter. “How much is that Barbie in the window?”, he asks the shop assistant.
In a manner she responds,
“Which Barbie? We have Barbie Goes to
the Gym for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the
Ball for $19.95, Barbie Goes
Shopping for $19.95, Barbie
Goes to the Beach for $19.95, Barbie Goes Nightclubbing for
$19.95, and Divorced Barbie for
$395.00.”
The guy asks, “Why is Divorced Barbie different from all the others?”
“That’s obvious,” the assistant states,
“Divorced Barbie comes with Ken’s house, Ken’s
car, Ken’s boat, Ken’s furniture…..”
·
A policeman caught a nasty little boy with a penknife in one hand and a squirrel in the other.
“Now
listen here,” the policeman said, “Whatever yo do to that poor, defenceless
creature I shall personally do to you”
“In that case,” said the
boy, “I’ll kiss it’s butt and let it go”
·
Teacher asks children, what do you wish to do in future?
Ram : I want to be a pilot.
Vinod : I want to be a doctor.
Deepa : I want to be a good mother.
Ravi : I want to help Deepa.
Vinod : I want to be a doctor.
Deepa : I want to be a good mother.
Ravi : I want to help Deepa.
·
A woman wanted to reach her husband on his mobile phone but discovered that she was out of credit; she instructed her son – to use his own phone to pass across an urgent message to daddy who is at site.
After
junior had called, he got back to mummy to inform her that it was a lady that picked up daddy’s
phone thethree times he tried reaching dad on the mobile.
She waited impatiently
for her husband to return from
site, immediately she sighted him, she gave him a
very hot slap, while the man was trying to ask why?
She
repeated the slap, people from neighborhood rushed around to know the cause of
this.
The man asked junior to
tell everybody what the lady said to him when he called,
Junior said “the number u are trying to call is not reachable“.
Junior said “the number u are trying to call is not reachable“.
Little
Bobby came
into the kitchen where
his mother was making dinner.
His birthday was coming
up and he thought this
was a good time to tell his mother what he wanted.
“Mom, I want a bike for my birthday.” Little Bobby was a bit
of a troublemaker. He had gotten into trouble at
school and at home.
Bobby’s mother asked him if he thought he deserved to get a bike for his birthday.
Little Bobby, of course, thought he did.
Bobby’s mother wanted
Bobby to reflect on his behavior over the last year.
“Go to your room, Bobby, and think about how you have behaved
this year.
Then write a letter to God and tell him why
you deserve a bike for your birthday.”
Little Bobby stomped up the steps to his room and sat down to
write God a letter.
Submitted
by: Zainab
·
There were two brothers at aged 12 & 8. They were so naughty and always people comes with complain to their parents. Parents became very fed-up and they have taken them to the mental doctor.
Doctor firstly call 12
years boy and asked him “Tell me where is god?” The boy keep himsilence. Then
doctor again with loud voice asked him “Tell
me where is God?”.
The boy suddenly ran away
and went to his home and hide himself in
his cloth cupboard.
When another brother saw that he also ran away after him and
reached to the home and asked “Brother what doctor asked you and why you ran
away?”
The
elder brother said, “God is
missing and everybody thinking that we did it”
Submitted
by: Shafeen Mahmood
·
Teacher: Johnny, name two pronouns.
Johnny: Who, me?
Teacher: Very good!
·
While browsing through the marriage and honeymoon photographs of the parents, the Beta asks his Papa:
Beta : “Papa, Papa, Jub aap aur mama honeymoon pe gaye thai, tab main
kahan tha?”
Baap : “Beta, jaate samay tum Papa ke paas tha, aate samay tum Mama
ke paas thai.”
·
A little boy was afraid of the dark. One night his mother told him to go out to the back porch and bring her the broom. The little boy turned to his mother and said, “Mama, I don’t want to go out there. It’s dark.”
The mother smiled
reassuringly at her son. “You don’t have to be afraid of the dark,” she
explained. “God is out
there. He’ll look after you and protect you.”
The little boy looked at his mother real hard and asked, “Are you sure he’s out there?”
“Yes, I’m sure. He is
everywhere, and he is always ready to help you when you need him,” she said.
The little boy thought about that for a minute and then went to the back door and
cracked it a little. Peering out into the
darkness, he called, “God? If
you’re out there, would you please hand me the broom?”
A woman wanted to reach her husband on his mobile phone but discovered
that she was out of credit; she
instructed her son – to use his own
phone to pass across an urgent message to daddy who is at site.
After
junior had called, he got back to mummy to inform her that it was a lady that picked up daddy’s phone thethree times he
tried reaching dad on the mobile.
She waited impatiently for her husband to return from site, immediately
she sighted him, she gave him a very hot slap, while
the man was trying to ask why?
She
repeated the slap, people from neighborhood rushed around to know the cause of
this.
The man asked junior to
tell everybody what the lady said to him when he called,
Junior said “the number u are trying to call is not reachable“.
Junior said “the number u are trying to call is not reachable“.
·
A man walks into a store to buy a Barbie doll for his daughter. “How much is that Barbie in the window?”, he asks the shop assistant.
In a manner she responds,
“Which Barbie? We have Barbie Goes to
the Gym for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the
Ball for $19.95, Barbie Goes
Shopping for $19.95, Barbie
Goes to the Beach for $19.95, Barbie Goes Nightclubbing for
$19.95, and Divorced Barbie for
$395.00.”
The guy asks, “Why is Divorced Barbie different from all the others?”
“That’s obvious,” the assistant states,
“Divorced Barbie comes with Ken’s house, Ken’s
car, Ken’s boat, Ken’s furniture…..”
·
Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents the week before Christmas.
At
bedtime, the two boys knelt beside their beds to say their prayers when
the youngest one began praying atthe top
of his lungs.
“I pray
for a new bicycle!”
“I pray for a new Nintendo!”
“I pray for a new VCR!”
“I pray for a new Nintendo!”
“I pray for a new VCR!”
His older brother leaned
over and nudged the younger brother and said, “Why are you shouting your prayers? God isn’t deaf.“
To which the little
brother replied, “No, but Grandma is!“
·
Child : Mom isbar hum sare patake is shop se lenge.
Mom : lekin beta ye toh girls hostel hai.
Child : Papa to kehte hai k i phuljadiya yahi raheti hai.
Child : Papa to kehte hai k i phuljadiya yahi raheti hai.
Submitted
by: Imtiaz
·
Chota Santa stopped by the corner grocery store and read the following list to the Sabji wala:
10 kilo sugar at Rs 1.25
a kilo
4 kilo coffee at Rs1.50 a kilo
2 kilo butter at Rs1.10 a kilo
2 bars soap at Rs0.83 each
4 kilo coffee at Rs1.50 a kilo
2 kilo butter at Rs1.10 a kilo
2 bars soap at Rs0.83 each
“How much does that come to?” asked
Larry.
“Twenty-two rupees and thirty-six paisa.”
“If I gave you three ten rupee bills, how much change
would I get?” said Chota Santa.
“Seven
rupees and sixty-four paisa,” stated the Sabji wala
who appeared to be irritated by all the questions.
Chota Santa said, as he
disappeared through the door, “Mujhe
ye sab nahi kharid ne ka he.. mujhe to bas apne kal ke math homework ka
an“
No comments:
Post a Comment